In a recent LinkedIn post, Emily Lyons discusses the common pitfalls individuals face when crafting dating profiles, likening them to resumes that often misrepresent the applicant. Lyons, who reviews dating profiles professionally, argues that most people write for an idealized future partner rather than for who they genuinely are.
The Mismatch Between Aspiration and Reality
Lyons highlights a prevalent issue: the tendency to portray an aspirational version of oneself rather than the authentic individual. This often leads to profiles that attract the wrong kind of attention or fail to connect with genuinely compatible matches. She points out the disconnect between what someone enjoys and what they present on their profile.
“Most people write their profile for who they want to attract instead of who they actually are.”
According to Lyons, this misalignment can be detrimental. For instance, she notes that if hiking is mentioned but rarely practiced, it’s a misrepresentation. Similarly, desiring an “adventurous” partner while preferring a quiet Saturday at home needs to be honestly reflected.
Crafting an Authentic Digital Introduction
Lyons offers a practical framework for creating a dating profile that resonates with authenticity and attracts the right person. She emphasizes that the ideal match is looking for the real you, not a fabricated persona.
Key Elements of an Effective Profile
Lyons breaks down her advice into actionable steps:
- First Photo: Should be a clear, smiling photo of just the individual, taken in natural light. It should not be a group photo, a misleading selfie, or an outdated picture.
- Bio: This section should answer the question: “What is it like to spend a regular day with you?” The focus should be on a typical day, not an exceptional one.
- Prompts: Instead of generic statements like “I’m looking for someone who can make me laugh,” prompts should reveal specific, unique aspects of one’s personality.
As Lyons suggests, specificity makes a profile relatable and authentic. She provides an example: “I’ll talk about true crime documentaries for three hours straight and I’m not sorry about it.” This level of detail, she argues, creates a genuine picture of a person.
“That’s a person. That’s real. That’s dateable.”
The core message from Lyons is to abandon the strategy of writing for an imaginary audience. Instead, the focus should be on creating a profile that speaks directly to the one person who will read it and feel an immediate connection.
“Stop writing profiles for an imaginary audience. Write it for the one person who’s going to read it and think ‘finally.’”
By adhering to these principles, Lyons believes individuals can move beyond the “wrong job” application and find a partner who appreciates them for who they truly are.
📝 About This Content
This article is based on insights shared by Emily Lyons on LinkedIn.
📅 Originally posted on March 6, 2026 | View original post on LinkedIn →