Steven Bartlett Challenges the Pursuit of Independence, Advocating for Interdependence

In a recent LinkedIn post, entrepreneur and media personality Steven Bartlett challenges a deeply ingrained cultural narrative: the relentless pursuit of independence. Bartlett argues that the modern emphasis on self-reliance, epitomized by phrases like “be your own boss” and “trust no one,” is leading to widespread feelings of emptiness, loneliness, and a lack of purpose among younger generations.

Bartlett opens his post by directly confronting what he terms an “unpopular opinion”: that the societal push towards independence has been a harmful lie. He contrasts this with the perceived aspirations sold to his generation, listing common mantras:

“Be your own boss.” “Trust no one.” “Don’t settle down.” “Commit to nothing.” “Depend on nobody.” “Live anywhere.” “Leave whenever.”

He questions the outcome of this philosophy, pointing to stark statistics. “In a UK poll, 89% of people aged 16–29 said they felt their lives ‘lack any meaning or purpose,'” Bartlett states, highlighting a significant disconnect between perceived success and internal fulfillment. He further notes the alarming rise in loneliness among young people, citing that “73% of Gen Z report feeling lonely ‘sometimes or always,'” a dramatic increase from previous decades.

The Paradox of Freedom: Isolation and Meaninglessness

Bartlett posits that the optimization for freedom has inadvertently led to isolation. “We optimised for freedom and got isolation and we chose to have as many options as possible over any obligations,” he writes. This, in his view, has resulted in a generation that, while potentially successful and untethered, experiences profound meaninglessness and loneliness.

He contrasts this with his observations of the happiest individuals he has interviewed. According to Bartlett, these people do not lead independent lives but are instead “completely interwoven.” He elaborates:

People need them. They need people. They build things together that none of you could build alone. They show up because someone else is counting on them.

Bartlett draws a parallel with ancestral societies, suggesting they understood the inherent human need for connection and shared endeavor. “Our ancestors knew better…. they built things TOGETHER. Raised children in villages TOGETHER. Created things that outlasted them TOGETHER. They belonged somewhere, to someone, for something,” he argues.

Redefining Success: The Power of Interdependence

As an entrepreneur himself, Bartlett refutes the notion of the lone wolf founder. He asserts that his own life, far from being one of absolute freedom, is characterized by significant dependence and responsibility. “I have more DEPENDENCE in my life than almost anyone I know. In many ways I have the least freedom. I have more responsibility. More people counting on me. More accountability,” he shares. This, he contends, is the source of his own life’s meaning and worth.

Bartlett proposes a shift in aspirational goals, moving away from the toxic ideal of “be your own boss.” He suggests an alternative focus: “Be needed. Be someone other people rely on AND need other people, and rely on them too!”

He concludes by emphasizing the inherent trade-offs in life. For those experiencing a lack of meaning, Bartlett suggests the solution might not be more individual success, but rather enhanced connection, a new form of shared struggle, or increased responsibility. “Maybe it’s not independence we should be aiming for, maybe it’s more Interdependence,” he proposes.