Steven Bartlett Urges Authenticity, Advises Looking Backwards for Self-Discovery

In a recent LinkedIn post, Steven Bartlett offers profound advice to his younger self, emphasizing the importance of embracing one’s true nature and disregarding external validation. Responding to a question about what he would tell a 10-year-old Steven, the entrepreneur and investor shared insights that resonate with anyone navigating the complexities of personal and professional growth.

Rediscovering Your True North Through Childhood Passions

Bartlett suggests that the passions we hold dear in childhood are often more indicative of our authentic selves than the aspirations we develop in adulthood. He posits that children, unburdened by societal expectations, follow their interests naturally, whereas adults often perform a version of passion dictated by external pressures.

“The things you love at 8 years old are more aligned with your true nature than the things you think you should love at 25… because as a kid you don’t perform passion, you just follow it…but adults perform what they were told passion is allowed to look like”

According to Bartlett, this distinction is crucial for self-discovery. He argues that the path to understanding oneself might not lie in forward-looking ambition, but rather in introspection and a reconnection with early interests. As Bartlett notes, “therefore, to find yourself, you probably don’t need to look forward – you probably need to look backwards.” This perspective encourages a re-evaluation of current pursuits against the backdrop of one’s innate inclinations.

The Ephemeral Nature of External Validation

A significant portion of Bartlett’s message addresses the futility of seeking approval from others. He points out that the people we desperately try to impress are often transient figures in our lives, and the energy expended on fitting in is frequently misplaced.

“also, all these people you’re desperately trying to impress won’t be in your life in a couple years – the energy you’re wasting trying to fit in should be spent on things that actually matter – future you will be annoyed that you wasted so much worry on all these temporary people, and neglected the permanent people.”

Bartlett contends that this misplaced focus leads to regret, as valuable energy is diverted from more meaningful pursuits and relationships. In his view, the perceived need to conform to the expectations of a fleeting social circle detracts from investing in enduring connections and personal development.

Embracing Quirks as Competitive Advantages

Furthermore, Bartlett touches upon the transformative power of embracing one’s unique qualities. He suggests that the very traits one might try to hide – those perceived as ‘weird,’ ‘different,’ or ‘strange’ – can ultimately become significant strengths.

“someday all the ways that people think you’re weird, different and strange – all the things you’re currently trying to hide – will be all the things you value the most…your quirks will become your competitive advantages, your weirdness will become your worth.”

This perspective offers a powerful reframing of individuality, encouraging individuals to see their distinctiveness not as a liability, but as a source of unique value and competitive edge. Bartlett’s assertion is that what makes someone different is precisely what can make them valuable.

The Universal Indifference and the Freedom It Grants

In a striking observation, Bartlett highlights a fundamental aspect of human interaction: general indifference. He explains that people are largely preoccupied with their own lives, leaving little cognitive space to intensely focus on the successes or failures of others.

“And….nobody cares. they don’t really care when you succeed, and they don’t really care when you fail. Not because they don’t love you – but because people are so busy focused on themselves – that they don’t have the space to think about you all that much.”

This realization, as Bartlett points out, is liberating. It serves as permission to take risks, to stumble, and to persevere without the paralyzing fear of judgment. As he concludes, this understanding empowers individuals to “take on hard challenges, fall flat on your face, pick yourself up, and try again, and again, and again and again.” Ultimately, Bartlett suggests that the advice we would offer our younger selves often mirrors the guidance we need in the present moment, fostering a continuous cycle of self-reflection and growth.