In a recent LinkedIn post, Vanessa Van Edwards discusses the profound impact of choosing to see the good in people, even amidst their flaws and mistakes. She contrasts the ease of criticism with the courage required to look deeper, highlighting how supportive relationships can foster personal growth and a more compassionate outlook.
Vanessa Van Edwards begins by noting the inherent human tendency to focus on the negative. “It’s easy to find what’s wrong with people. The awkward thing they said. The mistake they made. The habit that drives you crazy. The flaw that feels impossible to ignore. Criticism is easy. Most people can do it,” she writes.
“What takes courage is choosing to look deeper.”
Shifting from Criticism to Understanding
The core of Van Edwards’ message revolves around the transformative power of being seen and supported through one’s imperfections. She shares a personal anecdote about her partner, Scott, illustrating how he consistently saw her potential beyond her mistakes and insecurities. “He saw the awkwardness, the insecurities, the communication failures, and all the ways I still needed to grow. But instead of defining me by those things, he guided me through them,” Van Edwards explains.
This approach, she argues, is not about ignoring flaws but about understanding and growing through them. “He didn’t shame me for my blind spots. He communicated with me, challenged me, and loved me through them,” she states, emphasizing that this kind of unconditional support is life-changing.
“Being loved that way changes you.”
Cultivating Compassion Through Positive Affirmation
According to Vanessa Van Edwards, experiencing this kind of positive affirmation has a ripple effect. When someone consistently sees the good in us, especially when we struggle to see it ourselves, we begin to internalize that perspective. This, in turn, influences how we interact with others.
“When someone consistently sees the good in you, even when you’re struggling to see it in yourself, you start learning how to do the same for other people,” Van Edwards observes. This leads to a fundamental shift in our focus: becoming “less interested in judging and more interested in understanding. Less focused on flaws and more focused on potential.”
The Evolution of Perspective
As individuals mature, their priorities and perspectives evolve. Van Edwards reflects on this progression, stating, “The older I get, the more I realize that finding fault in people isn’t a talent. Finding the good in them is.” This perspective shift underscores the value of empathy and the strength found in recognizing and nurturing the positive attributes of others.
“And sometimes the reason we’re able to see the good in others is because someone first chose to see it in us. ❤️”
Ultimately, Vanessa Van Edwards concludes her post by suggesting that our capacity to see the good in others is often a reflection of the compassion we have received. It’s a powerful reminder that fostering a more understanding and supportive environment starts with choosing to see the best in each other, a practice that requires courage but yields profound rewards.
📝 About This Content
This article is based on insights shared by Vanessa Van Edwards on LinkedIn.
📅 Originally posted on July 10, 2026 | View original post on LinkedIn →